Hopeful? Yeah Right.

Sunday, August 23, 2009 at 11:48pm

Ok, here I am sitting in a café along with my laptop in front of me and an empty glass used to be filled with cold café latte. I've decided to spend sometime utilizing the free wifi the café has provided. My initial purpose was to update my anti-virus. After browsing through the meal lists, the black pepper beef burger with fries seemed to be tempting. After Burger and fries were done, I enticed myself with a creamy hot café latte. The waiter instead brought me a cold one. Oh well… I eventually took the coffee. While eating, I browsed around hoping to get busy accompanied by the vast connection that the virtual world may provide. A slight expectation flashed through my mind. Perhaps I can find my special someone through a simple chat in the net or perhaps the person may be sitting in the room right now. I scanned the room a while.. Nope, definitely that special someone is not in this room. I decided to continue surfing around again hoping to find a simple nice chat that will continue to stir some chemistry and finally a joyous meeting. An hour later… darn! I'm out of coffee and interest. Sigh… well, that's the tricky thing about hoping. You wish, prepare, and try your best to seize the opportunity but what do u get in the end? A pair of sore eyes and a bad mood to vent. And I'm not just talking about a silly search-for-the-one on the internet, the whole hoping architecture is just a medium to take you way up high and then drop you off without a parachute.

Here's the thing. Hope is a double-edged sword. It's sharp enough to cut through the bushes and thorns of loneliness. It's so strong to push through the ceiling so that the ray of light can come and shine in. Nevertheless like other weaponries, it's dangerous. It's too sharp that you will find yourself sliced in some parts after using it. It's also heavy enough for you to keep on carrying. Having those choices, which one lures people the most, the benefit you may get or the pain you may suffer?

In my opinion, a never-failing hope is none existence. In some part of the way, you may find that the things you expect the most will fail you. It gives you a bliss when you know there is a possibility of getting what you want. But at some point the sweet fruit turns sour. Some thinks it's just a form of a test to spice things up and to culminate the joy when the hope is fulfilled. It generates the sense that the wait is worthwhile. But does the spikes and hurdles that stumble us along the path of hoping can mean that it's not worth hoping? That it's time to stop? Or perhaps hope is just a temporary mechanism to help human passing through some period of time and after some time has passed, yet the hope still unfulfilled, the new set of hopes are made just to pass through another moment? Then can we say that hope is virtual or just a "quasi" sort of things? Well, it's up to you to interpret whatever vibe the universe is sending you through the expectations and the clues that circles around the hope you're having. For me, I'm done hoping.

-LSy-