Yes, I'm weak and I lapsed. I said that I moved on, but I'm not sure about that. Thanks for always listening, reading and paying attention to my stories, sharings, etc. You all are true friends. Sorry for annoying you with all of those. I'll try not to bother you again. If you feel annoyed, please don't continue reading this.
For you:
If it's me that you're talking about, then I will say, "No, you're not losing me. I'm here and will be back soon."
I miss u and I can't lie about it.
You r a nice person and you don;t deserve me. I'm not a good person, I know that for sure. I've done things that I'm not proud of and I don't think you'll ever like those things.
I didn't lie about what I said in my last message to you. However, things are changed now.
You hurt me. So bad that I almost lost faith in trying to have relationship with someone or even trying to like someone. Because when I tried to open my heart to you, you just left me out in the cold. I don't know if you know about it. I don't know if you do it on purpose because I never tell you again what I feel. I don't want to bother you again as I said in my sms to you.
Now I kinda regreted now why I don't want to try the relationship that you suggested that night when I bid farewell to you.
After I got your sms, the one about how you're annoyed with my reponse in FB, I was petrifed, struck, and hurt deeply. Your words pierced so deep and you texted as if you don't know me, as if I'm a complete stranger.
After that I tried so hard to forget you. my friends said that you're not worth it, but I don't know why i still think that you do.
Until now, you don't say a thing to me. Your last sms was on your birthday and you only considered me as a little brother.
I thought, "that's it." It was clear that you want this to be over and I am nothing to you now. I stopped hoping. Hoping that you will text me, call me, whatever. And you don't until now. But I can't lie. I didn't completely stop hoping.
I like you. a lot. that is for sure. What is unsure now is how you feel about me and what I should do next. i'm hung up. If you still want to continue what we had, please tell me so because I reall really like you. it's painful to keep on waiting in uncertainty. you can call me pathetic, whatever. If you dont' want to continue what we had, then please let me out of your life. It will hurt like hell for me and maybe for you too, but maybe that's better.
I'm still waiting. Waiting to go home soon. Waiting to continue my life. Waiting to hear from you.
I'm risking my heart, risking my feeling. I just want to hear from you.
-LSy-
