Sigh...
That is what I can say about my life post-Singapore. During my stay in Singapore, I was really looking forward to coming home. The hope of meeting my friends, sleeping in own place again, getting back to my own life, being independent and having a part-time job while finishing my study, reconnect with a special someone; all those hopes made me strong to cope during the four months in Singapore.
After I got back to Jakarta, my hopes or my so-called-dream shattered one by one.
The special someone I was hoping to reconnect with simply avoids me and just disappear. It was my fault to put high hopes on that person and let my guard down just for that person. All left now are just heartache and disappointment.
Getting back to Depok means that I have to find a new place to stay. One of my friends helped me to arrange it. She said, the room condition was not good, so it's gonna need extra efforts to fix the room. When I got to the room, I was in utter shock. It was totally not livable for human. I stayed at her place for quite sometime because I'm doing an internship and it's closer to get to my workplace from Depok than from my house. For the last four days, all I did was just painting the walls, scrubbing the floors, sanitizing the room in an attempt to make it livable. Finally, I moved in on Saturday night.
My financial condition? When checking my bank accounts, I can officially declare that I'm broke.
My internship? It turned out to be unpaid internship and so far what I do is only listening to lectures.
I lost my cell phone in Singapore, and now my iPod is having trouble.
All in all, I can say that I'm a complete wreck. Everything I planned just went off. Nothing happened like what I expected. But, I refuse to give up on the situation. I really don't know what else to expect now, what to look for, what are the things that can give me reasons to move on, but I don't wanna stop and just keep on whining. I think I just have to suck it up, accepting things the way they are now and try to make my way through every situation. Thk God I have my friends with me.
For now, I just keep this quote on mind: The darkest hour of the day is just a moment before sunrise.
-LSy-
That is what I can say about my life post-Singapore. During my stay in Singapore, I was really looking forward to coming home. The hope of meeting my friends, sleeping in own place again, getting back to my own life, being independent and having a part-time job while finishing my study, reconnect with a special someone; all those hopes made me strong to cope during the four months in Singapore.
After I got back to Jakarta, my hopes or my so-called-dream shattered one by one.
The special someone I was hoping to reconnect with simply avoids me and just disappear. It was my fault to put high hopes on that person and let my guard down just for that person. All left now are just heartache and disappointment.
Getting back to Depok means that I have to find a new place to stay. One of my friends helped me to arrange it. She said, the room condition was not good, so it's gonna need extra efforts to fix the room. When I got to the room, I was in utter shock. It was totally not livable for human. I stayed at her place for quite sometime because I'm doing an internship and it's closer to get to my workplace from Depok than from my house. For the last four days, all I did was just painting the walls, scrubbing the floors, sanitizing the room in an attempt to make it livable. Finally, I moved in on Saturday night.
My financial condition? When checking my bank accounts, I can officially declare that I'm broke.
My internship? It turned out to be unpaid internship and so far what I do is only listening to lectures.
I lost my cell phone in Singapore, and now my iPod is having trouble.
All in all, I can say that I'm a complete wreck. Everything I planned just went off. Nothing happened like what I expected. But, I refuse to give up on the situation. I really don't know what else to expect now, what to look for, what are the things that can give me reasons to move on, but I don't wanna stop and just keep on whining. I think I just have to suck it up, accepting things the way they are now and try to make my way through every situation. Thk God I have my friends with me.
For now, I just keep this quote on mind: The darkest hour of the day is just a moment before sunrise.
-LSy-
