It was 11.30 pm and I was ready to go to bed. I had nothing to do all day, but my head was stuffed as if it had been working with loads of problem. I wanted to stay up a bit late, but the internet connection (the sole source of entertainment) is having a problem and my eyes also refused to cooperate. I decided to wrap myself under the blanket.
I tried to sleep. I rolled left and right trying to get into the right postion that perhaps will get me asleep soon. At some point my mind wandered somewhere...ah.. it's started. The journey to the other realm has started. But suddenly i was awakened, not fully awake though. That process happened several times until I was fully awakened by a message on my cell phone. At first I don't want to open it, but I thought perhaps the message is from that person. It was 12.30 as I glanced to the clock that's ticking on the wall.
I was right. And that point I hated to be right. I've been waiting for that person to contact me. I could have contacted that person 1st (which I did by just saying Hi! this afternoon), but I don't want to look too pushy and stuff, so I waited. The message was not something I expected. It struck me. It's not literary a bad news, but the way it's said, made my chest pounding hard until now. After a long wait in hope of warm and fuzzy contact from that person, I was petrified.
I'm fully awake now and can't sleep. The aches in my chest is just unbearable. I don't want to let go the best thing that ever happened in my life just yet. I didn't have enough time after we met and I want to know what will happen next when we meet again. Is that person letting me go? Am I just being emotional and overreacting?
I always restrained myself from letting my feeling to interfere when it comes to love. I kept myself from giving all of my heart because I'm afraid of the pain it may cause, like what I had several times before. The bruises in my heart have not healed completely, but last December I took a risk and put my heart as the wager. If I win, maybe I will know what love taste like. But am I losing now?
If I knew the pain that's coming, do I regret going to that coffee house on December 5th and said 'yes' to that person when that person asked me to join that person's table? If I didn't come or perhaps said 'no', then I would have missed the great things that happen for the next twenty days... Do I regret it? No, I don't regret it.
I'm turning my cell phone off now... I can't bear anymore hurt... I just wished everything would just be the same before I got that late night message.
-LSy-
I tried to sleep. I rolled left and right trying to get into the right postion that perhaps will get me asleep soon. At some point my mind wandered somewhere...ah.. it's started. The journey to the other realm has started. But suddenly i was awakened, not fully awake though. That process happened several times until I was fully awakened by a message on my cell phone. At first I don't want to open it, but I thought perhaps the message is from that person. It was 12.30 as I glanced to the clock that's ticking on the wall.
I was right. And that point I hated to be right. I've been waiting for that person to contact me. I could have contacted that person 1st (which I did by just saying Hi! this afternoon), but I don't want to look too pushy and stuff, so I waited. The message was not something I expected. It struck me. It's not literary a bad news, but the way it's said, made my chest pounding hard until now. After a long wait in hope of warm and fuzzy contact from that person, I was petrified.
I'm fully awake now and can't sleep. The aches in my chest is just unbearable. I don't want to let go the best thing that ever happened in my life just yet. I didn't have enough time after we met and I want to know what will happen next when we meet again. Is that person letting me go? Am I just being emotional and overreacting?
I always restrained myself from letting my feeling to interfere when it comes to love. I kept myself from giving all of my heart because I'm afraid of the pain it may cause, like what I had several times before. The bruises in my heart have not healed completely, but last December I took a risk and put my heart as the wager. If I win, maybe I will know what love taste like. But am I losing now?
If I knew the pain that's coming, do I regret going to that coffee house on December 5th and said 'yes' to that person when that person asked me to join that person's table? If I didn't come or perhaps said 'no', then I would have missed the great things that happen for the next twenty days... Do I regret it? No, I don't regret it.
I'm turning my cell phone off now... I can't bear anymore hurt... I just wished everything would just be the same before I got that late night message.
-LSy-
